I'm about to order some jeans and several pairs of pants from Gap.com. Again.
When committing to take domperidone to induce lactation, I knew one of the associated side effects would be weight gain because I've seen it in myself and every other woman I know who used domperidone for a long time period. I anticipated the socially trained self-dislike that would come along with the extra padding and have spent plenty of time over the past 2.5 years channelling that energy into plenty of positive affirmations about being lovable at any weight and appreciation for my body's amazing ability to make milk to grow a baby.
What I had not anticipated, and find myself constantly frustrated by, is how expensive carrying extra weight around is. Right now I'm totally fixated on how my weight dictates that I need to buy new pants every 3 months. At my usual weight, I can wear a pair of jeans for 2 or 3 years because they're so durable. But add 50 pounds, maybe all to my thighs and derriere, and the amount of rubbing on the inner seams that comes from a day's activities means a trip to the Gap every 3 months because I've sprung another leak.
Maybe the only thing worse than yet again shelling out my husband's hard earned cash for more pants is walking through the day with the cubby bunnies that currently live on my thighs squeezing their way through the growing holes in my pants.
So I'm off to order more pants from Gap.com, looking forward to the day the hormones have washed out of my body and I find my way back to my own, regular weight.