Last night Rosie and I watched Elf together (she watched it earlier in the day with Bill). Usually, I steer FAR away from adoption movies as they can be such mine-fields. But Elf is recommended and enjoyed by several adult adoptees I know, so we rented it.
I was pleased. I think it handled the adoption related issues pretty well, and it created a few openings for conversation about what reunion can be like. I've read a lot of reunion related blogs, so this gave me an entrance to sharing some of those people's basic experiences with Rosie. I think she needs to hear some of the variety of these experiences right now as I know she's thinking a lot about being connected with her first mama.
Just after we finished the movie a friend called. I entered conversation with her by saying my daughter and I had just finished watching the movie Elf, to which Rosie shouted out, "I'm not your daughter, I'm K's daughter." I hugged her and told her how glad I am she likes that about herself. I also reminded her she will be both our daughter forever, and she will always be in both our hearts. She smiled at me and went to work on a puzzle.
I really am glad to see her shouting out the complexities of who she is to the world. It will take her far.
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